Visiting Layne and Anadeane

Over the summer we went to visit our dear friends Layne and Anadeane.  We were able to spend about a week there, including an Independence Day celebrations!
Little backstory.
John was baptized when he was 17.  Layne was his young men's president.  Beyond that Layne and Anadeane let John live with them for a while before he left on a mission.  They became family.
Now they are, in effect, grandparents to our kids.
Okay, more backstory.
Analee is, in part, named for Anadeane.  I spent so much time looking at names that it all became a blur before Analee was born.  I couldn't tell you where her name really came from.  Later, however, we realized something.  Not only do Anadeane and Analee share a syllable, but John's mom's name is Betty Lee.
Anadeane + Betty Lee = Analee
So, in honor of some lovely women, we reverse engineered her name and are even more pleased with it than we were before.

Back to the future.
Analee turned 7 this summer and, for the first time since she was a baby, we visited her namesake!

Layne setting up fireworks

Poppers

Layne

Anadeane

Enjoying the fireworks.

Family Photos

During this summer, before we left for South Dakota, we did the family picture bit.  Of course, we're not usually good at the whole coordinating outfits bit, but this time, well, I forgot.

Yep, forgot about family pictures.  So I scrambled and got the younger three in blue and orange...at that's about all I could get.  Once I realized I couldn't get the older two to match I said bag it and John and I didn't even try for John and I.

Oh well.  It's closer to reality this way anyways, right?

This was about as happy as Drake got.  Not sure why, he just didn't feel like smiling much.

In this one Drake actually looks angry, but I promise he wasn't!

This one is pretty true to life as well.  Analee is generally happy and always has a cheesy smile to share for photos.  Bubby is 100% exactly however he feels, right here that's goofy.  Drake typically comes across as quietly mischievous and skeptical.  Gideon is usually a bit more cheery, but is always close on the heels of the older three. So far Benjamin is happy and excited to join in the fun.

What Does the Fox Say?

It's been a crazy long time.
Crazy Long.

But now that we have an internet connection, well, here we go.

Things didn't pan out in Nebraska.  Maybe someday we'll write down everything that happened, but not now.
What now?  South Dakota.

Yep.  South Dakota.

We live just outside of Hoven.  (That's Northern South Dakota, in case you were wondering.)  And, despite being August, my kids put coats on when they went out to play this morning.  I can't complain too much though.  We've been here almost two weeks and I can already seem improvements on ol' NE.  There is slightly more variance in the landscape.  You know, instead of paper flat it's like blanket flat.  Still flat, but at least you can see things.  I'm also pretty surprised about the wildlife here.  In addition to the to-be-expected deer, we've seen frogs, foxes, turtles and a whole slew of birds, including heron and ducks and seagulls.  Seriously, seagulls.  We've got some marshy areas around plus a lake maybe 15 miles away.  That's our best guess as to why they'd be here.  I wouldn't have guessed that as a good enough reason, but there you go.
But I'm not gonna lie, I think the part that gets me to most are the foxes.  Have you ever heard a fox?  'Cause, despite popular media choices, they don't say "hockey hockey hockey po".  That first night was bizarre.  I had no idea what I was hearing.  That noise sounded like it should be coming out of the mouth of a baby moose.  Don't know what I'm talking about?  Well, this Animal Planet post is pretty good for that.  You can hear different fox calls as well as an explanation for that "hockey po" bit.  I'll let you guess which fox calls I've been hearing.  

But, strangely enough, one of the biggest plusses has been the dirt.  Have you ever been grateful for the dirt?  I realize that farmers think about dirt a lot.  But do the rest of us?  Well, I didn't until Nebraska.  Let me tell you about Nebraska dirt.  It's pretty much a combination of sand and dust (which, as a side note, grows spurs and not grass).  And when it rains that leaves you with a combination of mud and quicksand.  Multiple times we were 'mudded in'.  Traipse up North a bit.  It's just dirt.  Virginia was clay.  Nebraska was sandy dust.  South Dakota has dirt.  Right now we could use some rain, so it's dry, but it's just dirt.  And it grows grass.  The kids were so excited when they could walk outside without being stabbed.  Totally not kidding.

Anyways, sorry I don't have pictures now.  But I'm thinking I need to pull out the camera again.  Every spring I used to go picture happy.  In Virginia at least.  Not in Nebraska.  But maybe in South Dakota.

The More, the Merrier!

Currently, we have ten people living in what is a 3-bedroom one story home with a basement.  Four of us live upstairs in two of the bedrooms, the other bedroom is the TV room, and six of us live in the basement.  Mom and Dad have their room, and the girls (Anja and Analee) live across the hall from them.  Anika, Gideon, and I have a room downstairs.  Josiah, Bub, and Duck share a room, as well.  Today we add to the mix Aunt (or sister) Erika, who will live in what is known here as the Little House.  (It's basically a converted wood shop out back.)  So 11, now.  Three bathrooms help, but we need to get another shower operational, or shower time will be an even bigger mess here. 

Dad is running for city council here in Lincoln, and has put Anika to work on social media, so expect more of that coming soon.  Feel free to like Dad even if you aren't in the area.  We'll post something when we get his stuff up.  Anika and I registered to vote here in Lincoln, so he's got our votes, for sure.

I'm applying to a number of jobs in the area.  One of them seems fun; I am applying to tutor the jocks at UNL.  I'd get paid well-ish, and it'd be fun to work at UNL.  I'm also applying for teaching certification here in Nebraska.  I don't know what the future holds, but I'm willing to embrace it.  I am no longer complaining about where I live; instead, I'm happy to be somewhere.  Can't wait for the future!

New Normal

We're starting to get used to the new normal.  Life is still up in the air, but we're still finding pieces of normality all around.  We're settling into a new rhythm that meshes with our now-huge household.  I get up first usually, around 5 or 6 in the morning.  Then we do our best to both keep busy and out of Mom's way until it's time for combined bed time.  Then heck breaks loose as 5 kids brush teeth and get ready for bed, then songs, scriptures, prayer, and books for everybody, and then screaming (er...ahem...bedtime) for our two oldest boys, while our girl and Aunt Anja (8 years old) and Uncle Josiah (10) listen to a chapter book.  I usually go to sleep between our boys' bedtime and Josiah, who shares a room with them.

All of the kids here (all six of them!) are trying to find their place in the new household, which means fighting and limit testing.  Luckily for us, they mostly sleep through the night.  We find the line between parent and brother/sister/grandma/grampa is a difficult one to toe, but I think offense is being limited, for the most part.

We're going car hunting tomorrow, so normalcy might start returning in a big way.  Once I have a car, I can start really job hunting.  I'll probably end up substitute teaching, but I need a teaching license here in Nebraska before I can do so.  In the meantime, I plan on working at some store that is desperate for work (there are a lot in the area, apparently), just to earn a little bit of a living.

Our kids are getting ready for Christmas, which means ever-changing Christmas lists and fighting over whose will be the best.  I don't want anything for Christmas but a job, and nobody that lives here can give that to me.  So I honestly hope I don't get anything, though I have a lot of desires.  After moving recently and hoping to move again soon, I don't want anything else to schlep from here to wherever we end up.

I continue putting in applications, hoping against hope that someone will hire me.  I continue to find that in this profession, it's more about who you know than what.  I might be the best teacher the world's ever seen, but can't get a job because I'm not good at making connections with adults.  (I'm great with kids, though, I swear!)

In the meantime, the world keeps turning, and eventually life will go on.

Blessings from the Storm

As mentioned, we've noticed a number of blessings from the accident.  Among them are the following:

1.  Our Cutco knives were among the last things packed, and they weren't packed solidly.  In fact, that box wasn't even closed.  And it was in the front seat, next to me and in front of the kids.  They never moved.  We totaled our car, but the knives never moved.

2.  Razor blades were flying around the car in the accident, but nobody got hit.  As we were getting out, my good wife saw one on top of the air bag. 

3.  We all literally walked away.  Admittedly, I stumbled out first, and then assured the paramedic that came running behind the car that we were fine.  I then looked back and saw my wife gasping for air.  (Needless to say, our air conditioning was toast, and spitting out smoke.)  I then pried her door open and we stumbled out and away from the car.  The kids (especially John William Adams) were so enamored with the wreck that they kept going back to it.  The sheriff told us to keep our kids off the bridge where we wrecked, so we tried.  Occasionally a kid got away from us.

4.  We were on the bridge, so we could crash into the wall, and not fall into a ditch.    If we'd have hit the ditch, we probably would have rolled.  Drake's car seat came unhitched during the accident, and if it'd happened in a roll, who knows what kind of damage would have been done?

5.  We got to meet the Daetwylers.  Awesome people.

6.  Analee wasn't there.  Grandma picked her up earlier, much to Anika's chagrin.  If she'd have been there, it would have been mayhem.

7.  We left my car in Buena Vista.  We didn't know why, but we got the clear impression to do so.  Turns out to have been great counsel.  What kind of accident would it have been if both cars were involved?

8.  The car was luckily totaled.  That means we don't have to go back and get it, and can get a "new" car in roughly the same condition as the old one.

9.  The police, EMT's, and other helping personnel were great.  We loved meeting and working with them.

10.  Most of our new ward knew who we were when we got here.  Instead of being just another new family, we're the family that got in the wreck on the way to town.  People we didn't know were coming up to us and talking to us on the first day, just to talk about the wreck.

So yes, the wreck was an unpleasant experience.  We still don't have a car quite yet.  Some of our stuff was broken (a Wii game part and a bread maker, not to mention car seats, which is really not much).  It's kinda thrown off some of our plans.  That said, we really find the blessings of the Lord, even in the clouds of life.  Some people find reasons to believe the Lord isn't there in the hard times.  We're not those people.  The Lord loves us.  In this, we are assured.

We're here!

Despite delays, we're actually in Lincoln, now!  ...and have been for about a week!

When we left Buena Vista last Tuesday, we expected to get to Lincoln in two long days.  It's about 1,100 miles distance, so we were braced for a long couple of days.

We were nowhere near prepared for what happened.

As we drove through Evansville, Indiana, I started thinking that we should stop.  My wife, on the other hand, always wants to get a bit farther.*  So we started to aim for Mt. Vernon, Illinois.  We got to about 4 miles from the Illinois border, and my wheel jerked to the left with no real cause.  I was in the wall and knew it'd be bad right away.  It turns out the van was totaled in the wreck, and the trailer with all of our stuff was on its side.  Luckily, nobody else was involved in the crash.  ...and we all literally walked away from the accident, though Drake had a limp for a few days. 

Great.  Now what?

So the police that showed up took us to a hotel (in Evansville), which was very nice of them.  One of them even gave Anika a coat because we just weren't prepared to wreck.  He also gave us his phone number just in case we needed it.  I can't say anything ill about the police.

So we called Anika's parents to let them know that we wouldn't be there the next day.  Then Anika started the insurance phone calls.  They lasted for days.  ...and our phone was quickly losing power.  The next day, still doing the insurance shuffle, our phone died.  That night, we asked Mom to put us in touch with a local bishop.  (We should have done that right when we got to the hotel room, in hindsight.)  He came over that night and started the process of helping us out.

Thursday morning, the Elders' Quorum president showed up to give us a ride to the Uhaul place, where we could get a truck to take us to Lincoln.  Then I went back to the hotel.  My wife and stuff were gone.  No worries, I figure, Bishop told us that Anika could spend some time with the sisters.  She'll be back soon.  At about noon, I ate the muffin that I'd picked up for her.  At about 2, I ate another.  Where was she?  At about 2:45, she called.  "What are you doing there?!?"  "Uhh...where should I be?"  About 5 minutes later, housekeeping showed up to let me know that my wife had checked out that morning.  (Wasn't it nice of her to tell me?!?)  I asked for a few minutes more to figure out where I was going, it was granted, and I called my wife back to figure out where I was going and when.

The high priest group leader was the next to call, and he set up time to move things from our newly busted trailer to our newly picked up truck.  That took about half an hour, and then off we went to the Relief Society president's home.

I should say right off the bat that we love the Daetwylers.  They took care of us and went far above the call of duty.  I'll let Anika write a bit more about them.  Needless to say, in my eyes they can do no wrong.

Still continuing the insurance boogie, Anika found a way to get us a car to get to Lincoln.  We picked it up on Friday morning, and then started to plan to get to Lincoln.  We decided to leave Friday afternoon, which put us through St. Louis right at rush hour (YAY!).  We stopped somewhere in Missouri that night, and then got to Lincoln on Saturday.

We've been unpacking and Thanksgiving ever since.  Literally.  We've noticed the blessings of the Lord being poured out on us from the first few minutes after the crash, but we're noticing them more and more since then.  The good Lord loves us.

That said, the hunt for a new family car begins.  Anyone want to give us a van?


* When we were first married (and less smart), we drove across the country a few times.  One day, we left Elko, Nevada.  As we passed through Cheyenne, Wyoming at about 9 PM, I thought it was about time to stop.  She asked "can we make it to Lincoln safely?"  "I guess."  I said.  About 8 hours later, we got to Lincoln.  It was horrific.  1,100 miles in one day.

Moving Update

So it's starting to hit us that we're moving.  We've got a lot of stuff!  It's amazing how much stuff can accumulate over the course of 6 years of marriage!  We found a home for our hockey equipment, and we're excited about that.  Mom has lots of assorted figurines that she's not taking, so we'll be gathering those up and finding homes for them.  We've packed a number of boxes of books (we're book people), and have given a number of them to Southern Virginia University.  We still have about 6 more boxes of books to pack.

You see, most of what we'll be taking with us is books and clothes.  Other than those, we're really not taking much.  No couches, or beds (though we are taking two twin mattresses), or entertainment centers or dishes or tables or really anything else is going with us; most of it we'll leave for the family moving in after us.

That said, we still have lots of stuff to get rid of.  It's crazy how much stuff accumulates over time.

Of course, we're still doing our own accumulation, even as we tear down 6 years of married stuff.  We have kids, and want them to feel both wanted and welcome in their new home.  So we're working kid-by-kid to create images along the lines of President Eyring's talk.  No, they're not made of wood, but after finishing our first one (for Gideon) for FHE last night, we're rather impressed.  We'll have to take a picture of it sometime so you can see it.  We'll put the pictures we create into frames, and then put those in each kid's new room.  Though Gideon will sleep with us, we want him to know that he's wanted.

As a part of the picture, we found a scripture that relates to each kid.  In Gideon's picture, we listed the Lord's words, ironically, to Gideon: "Go in this thy might, and thou shalt save Israel...."  (That's Judges 6:14, for the record.)  We also put in there the name of each kid and its meaning.  In Gideon Davis Adams's case, it's Hewer down (of men), Son of David, son of Adam.  Talk about a heritage to reach for!  I think he can do it all.  He's a stud.

I can't wait to find out what we come up with for our other kids.  We are truly raising a generation here, and it's great to see!

Gratitude

During today's Family Home Evening we talked about gratitude.  About how we should be grateful for everything Heavenly Father gives us.  And not just be glad we have it but to express that gratitude.  We went around a few times and let each person say something they were grateful for.  The kids' answers were fun.  Everything from books and toys to couches and...well...Drake kinda copied the last bit of everything I said.  John was, as always, the firm reminder of what's important, citing family members and Jesus Christ.  

Afterwards we asked each kid to pick someone that they wanted to say 'thank you' to and write that person a note.  We haven't delivered the notes yet (it was time for bed as soon as FHE was over) but are excited to do so tomorrow.

To go with John's wonderful example, here are some pictures of what I'm most grateful for:

School

So we've pulled Analee from school as an experiment.  (Anika wrote to the acting superintendent today telling her of this fact.)  We've had a lot of fun, but I fear we waited too long.  Babe's attitude has changed, and not all for the better.  I fear my little girl is a lot like her mom; change isn't easy for her. 

When Analee went to nursery, she loved it, but came home with some pretty weird ideas of how the world works.  Like she figured if she beat up on her brothers, she'd get what she wanted.  After all, it worked for some of the kids in her nursery class, so why wouldn't it work at home?

Apparently the squeaky wheel gets the grease in public school, too.  Analee figures if she pitches a big enough fit over something, we'll change plans.  She's mistaken, and learning it the hard way.

Alternatively, the silent wheel in the public school system appears forgotten.  Analee figures that if she doesn't want to do something, all she has to do is fly under the radar and we'll let things pass.  She's mistaken again.

Despite sickness and us being newbies to this whole teaching thing, we've had a lot of fun learning.  Every night, we ask Analee what she wants to learn about the next day.  Then we focus on that and offshoots of that plan for our lesson.  For example, on Monday, she wanted to learn about ballet.  So we watched a documentary on Russian ballet, and a quick how-to on how ballet shoes are made.  Then we spent a lot of the rest of the day dancing around.  Today, it was cats.  Not house cats, but lions, tigers, and leopards.  So we watched a documentary, again.  Then we played "big cats" and rolled around biting each other's necks, as big cats can.  You see, big cats don't put all of their pressure on the prey's neck; instead, they put just enough to cause death by cutting off blood supply.

Tonight, we asked her what she wanted to learn tomorrow.  "Dogs, Dickens, and ducks."

Wait, what?

Dickens?

Did our 5-year-old ask for Dickens?

Sweet!

So we'll watch Disney's "Mickey's Christmas Carol," which has dogs, Dickens, and ducks all in one film. 

I'm amped.

When we move (to wherever we're moving) in a month (-ish), we'll probably re-enroll her in public school.  Until then, we're having a blast.  I love it!

Moving.

So I've felt the need to move for a few months, now.  My wife, not so much.  Still, she's been migrating to my point of view.  Change, however, is a problem for my wife.  She recognizes that the only constant in life is change (a view that I actually don't think is true; is not the love of God constant?  or at least constantly increasing?), but doesn't like major life changes.  (Don't tell her that the rate at which we are having children constitutes a major life change every few months.)  At a recent Stake Conference (a gathering of local church congregations), she finally got the revelation that I'd been getting for months.

You see, we don't make major changes in life until we both get the revelation that we should.  It's a rule of ours that helps to avoid conflict between us.

At that Stake Conference, she got it.  She cried.  (Again, she hates change.)  But she faced the future resolutely.  She's a champ.

So where are we moving?  We have no clue. 

You see, the where is as important as the when (of which we also have no definite clue, though we're leaning to "before Thanksgiving," for reasons listed below).  Both are just a shade under the fact that we're actually going to move.

So since it wasn't revealed where or when we're moving, we're using Lincoln, Nebraska as our default.  Anika's mom and dad live there, and they offered about once a week since I graduated from Liberty in June to have us move there.  So our default is to move in with her folks.  I'm still secretly hoping for a job to pop up between now and then, but that's partially because I have this male need to support my family. 

The reasons for the placement of Lincoln for our family are many, but essentially boil down to three.  (1) I want to live closer to family, and Lincoln is both closer to my wife's family and my California family.  (2) We plan on moving West for my career.  This is related to #1, but is important enough to be separate.   I'm in the process of applying for licensure to teach in Nebraska, Kansas, and Oklahoma, but I'm also open to the idea of teaching basically anywhere I can support a family on a teacher's salary.  I figure I would have had a job if I lived in Arizona, and it would have been at one of the top schools on my list of desirable work locations.  So the pure location of Nebraska (middle of the country) makes it desirable, assuming we don't get a job in the meantime.  (3) We're fans of family-friendly environments.  I don't mean to be offensive, but Buena Vista is not entirely family-friendly.  The LDS community here is great, for the most part.  That said, they're the exception to the norm.  In Lincoln, the LDS community is rather small, but the people seem to be built for families, for the most part. 

So when will we move?  Again, we're looking at before Thanksgiving, since we're looking at moving towards Anika's family.  The earliest we can move is early November (barring a speedy move to a job, which would be just me, most likely).  I'm shooting for that.

So that's the news on our front.

Anyone have any boxes that we could use?

I am a Child of God

John mentioned before that after school can get pretty grumpy.  Analee is tired, the boys are tired, we're tired (the afternoon used to be our down time).  But what he didn't mention is that the mornings are pretty ugly, too.  Either we wake Analee up earlier (earlier than 6:30-6:45) and have her moan and groan and whine through an extremely slow morning routine or we let her wake up on her own/when she hears her brothers being loud and rush through it all.  When it comes down to it, though, she doesn't get to school on time unless we push.  Gentle reminders don't seem to help much and there is only so much you can prepare the night before.  It seems like every morning one of us gets to be the drill sergeant.  Put it all together and our daily schedule looks like this:

dark-7:45 - GO GO Grumpiness GO GO!

morning - we miss Analee 

afternoon - no, seriously, when will Analee come home?

3 - dreaded pick-up (dreaded b/c we have to go to the school)

before dinner - whine, cry, scream, fight, punch, kick, wail, flail, throw things (this involves all the kids, and hopefully no parents)

dinner - if we're lucky Analee doesn't comment on how disgusting dinner looks and how she won't touch it (note, a few months ago the dinner mantra seemed to be "I don't like it-BUT I'll eat it anyways")

bedtime - hopefully no crying, clinging, sobbing etc.


I don't know how people do this.  I can't handle it.

However

I did want to share something that brought a little peace.

This video soothed a crying baby, a crying two year old and a whining 4 year old in less than 30 seconds. 
My kids that know the words couldn't seem to help but join in.
I cried the first time I saw it.  (no joke)

Whether or not your days have been as crazy/upsetting/stressful etc. as what I've described above, I hope this video brings you not just a little peace, but a lot.

I know that I am a child of God.  He sent me to earth and has a plan for me.  Each of us is a child of God.

I've waited long enough! (How I stopped waiting for my wife to post and just did it myself.)

So after setting up my wife brilliantly for a post on the charter school that failed, we got...nothing.  Not even an "I'll get to it!" from my woman.  Try as I might, I just can't get her to post.  She claims she's "too tired" to post, and she does have a lot going on.  That said, we have a public to entertain with our not-so-great blog, so I'll step in.  Hey, late is better than never, or so I hear!

Analee is starting to waver on her choice to stay in public school.  Mom is definitely wavering.  You see, Babe is just drained when she gets home.  She's cranky and miserable, and when she gets home, her brothers go berserk.  "Let's see what Babe brought us!" they seem to yell.  So they're all over her, her school supplies, her lunch, and anything else she happens to bring home.  ...and she's just so tired that she can't help but snap at them. 

Fierce Babe is even creeping into our nights.  Last night, at about 10 (when I should have been LONG asleep but wasn't; more on that below), she came into our bedroom.  "I can't sleep.  Can I stay in here?"  Enter half-hour test of parents trying to get alone time vs. child who wants parent time.  She admitted that she misses us during the day (cue Mom's heart breaking; kid is good!), so we once again reiterated that she doesn't have to go to school.  She thought about it and told us she'd tell us in the morning.

I'm still torn on whether or not I want to see her stay in public school.  I find value in Analee facing others on their terms.  She meets people of different religions than her own, with different customs, and different lifestyles.  She has a great teacher, and Anika wants to bend over backwards for her. 

That said, socially, the school setting isn't helping Analee.  We've raised her to be nice to all people, and she's doing great.  She says "hi" to EVERYBODY, and knows their names.  Still, though, few respond in kind.  One girl, who we thought would be good friends with Babe, has repeatedly told her that she doesn't want to be friends with her. 

Further, I think she can get through 1st grade now, and she might just do that at home.  I'd be peachy with that, honestly.

She's home today.  (It's a "family day," which translates to us being to sick to think about taking her to school.)  We'll see if she goes back to school tomorrow.

A return to job hunting.

Since the start of the school year, I have put job hunting on the back burner.  It still happened (and happens), mind you, but it just wasn't a priority.  Cleaning house, taking care of the yard, helping with kids, and generally trying to (a) help out and (b) stay out of Anika's way (not an easy combination, let me tell you!).  I've applied for a few jobs, but not many.

One of them is interviewing me tonight.  It's in Arizona.  Do I want it?  Of course.  I'd love to teach entrepreneurship and economics in a middle school setting.  I love the primarily minority class of students.  I love what I think is the pay.  I love it all.  Except the placement.  Don't get me wrong, I have no problems with Arizona; it's closer to folks I love in California, for one.  That said, it's also farther from Anika's family, and we really want to get closer to them.  I would love to have my kids get really close to "Grandma and Grampa" (their names for themselves).  I want my kids to have a relationship with their aunts and uncles.  All of them.  Even if Anika is unsure about the type of relationship that the kids would have with them.  I love family, and find it important.

That said, I also find the ability to not just survive, but grow, to be just as important.  This job would allow such growth. 

There's another job, though only half time, in Iowa that I applied for.  I'm honestly not sure that I don't want it more.  We found a huge home in the same town that is well within our price range.  It's not a big city, like Tucson is.  But it's only half time.

If I get neither, I've been looking for part-time work here in Buena Vista, too.  I found a job that I could take part-time at SVU, but don't know that I want to be one of those people. 

Don't get me wrong; I have no problem with SVU grads/students working on the hill.  I think it's wonderful for SVU grads to have positions on the hill.  That said, I just don't think it's for me.  I don't want to be the guy who graduated and never left.  Even if I get a job in the area, there is and should be (in my opinion) a clear distinction between who I was and who I am.  I rarely go on the hill because of the difference.  I see professors and staff a heck of a lot more off-campus than on-. 

There's a job in Rockbridge County (more accurately Lexington, but it'd be for Rockbridge County Schools...more on them in a bit) that I think would work well with me.  There's another at VMI that I would love.  Ultimately, though, my goal is to teach.  Anything.  Anywhere.

Rockbridge County Schools.  What should I say about them?  Suffice it to say, we're not their greatest fans right now.  I'll let Anika dive into details, but it's enough to say that they rejected the charter for a school to which we wanted to send our kids.  We're not excited.  At all.  We're so unexcited that we've lately talked about moving to Lincoln just to get away from Buena Vista/Rockbridge County and start over again.  We'll see when/if that happens. 

Cue Anika.  Go, woman!  (I love you!)

Compassion

John keeps telling me I need to post.
I keep trying to decide what to say.

I have a post started.  The Aftermath II.
A continuation of my struggle with post-partum depression.
It needs to be said.
It will be said.
But not right now.

Right now I need something lighter, softer, kinder.
Something I found in Analee.

Before Analee started school she got a father's blessing.  In it she was told that she would need to learn how to be compassionate towards the other kids.
You see, Analee might not understand her classmates for a few reasons.

1) She loves learning - and is naturally good at it.  She eats it up.
Example-I used to make math worksheets for her, nothing special just addition and subtraction problems in whatever notebook she brought me.  But when Gideon was born I found my hands, literally, full.  I wasn't able to write up a worksheet for her whenever she wanted, so what did she do?  She made them herself.  Cute little boxes for the answers and all.  Not everyone learns quickly and not everyone likes it so much.

2) Analee has masterful control over her emotions.  She always has.  She can mask disappointment and sometimes even switch from sad to happy in mere seconds...frankly, that can be tough for most of us.  She is the epitome of composure.  In fact, most of the time I have to poke and prod to make sure I'm not overlooking some emotion in there-and often I am.  Then put her in a room with other 5 year olds who may not be so self-controlled.

In fact, in the first week or so would comment to us that this kid wasn't acting the way she should or that kid wasn't coloring inside the lines-he was scribbling, you shouldn't do that.  At first we'd try to temper these somewhat accusatory comments about other kids (it really is okay if someone scribbles on their paper).  I could tell that she just didn't comprehend why someone would behave differently from her.  Soon after she stopped accusing and started asking - why did this kid not listen to the teacher or why did that kid make a bad choice.

One day she told me a little boy had been crying and she went over to him.  Are you proud of me for sitting next to him and asking if he was okay? 

Today John picked her up from school.  When she got in the car he said he could see the wheels in her head turning (aren't those cool moments?).
Daddy, why does such n' such boy act mean sometimes and nice sometimes?
She went on to tell John some of the mean things the boy did.  John asked her if she told the teacher.
No, I don't think he was that bad.

I have to say, I'm really proud of her for that.  People (especially kids, but all of us are guilty) get caught up in 'fairness', which is oftentimes translated as mercy for me and justice for everyone else.  I mean, how often do we get annoyed by someone driving too fast or too slow or one thing they said just one time. We excuse ourselves saying "I'm tired" or "I've been really stressed", but rarely do we give others the benefit of the doubt.  Truly, think of the last time you were shocked or annoyed or offended, did you think of how the other person was feeling?  If you're like me, the answer was no. 

And yet, my 5 year old is started to learn differently.  She put aside her need for rules and fairness in exchange for compassion.  I am seriously touched by her emotional generosity and hope to become as generous. 


Am I proud of you?  Yes, my dear, very, very proud.


 

Labor Day Parade

So Monday was our annual Buena Vista Labor Day parade, which is also known as the "kickoff of the political season."  No, seriously, it deserves the quotation marks.  In our dinky town (though it's actually a city), big political names came to pay us a visit.  And shake hands.  And march roughly a mile down the main street in BV.  ...and speak at the park, though we thankfully missed that.  (More on that in just a bit.)  Oh, and the parade had a few other goodies, too!

First off, I shook hands with Bob Goodlatte.  Of the political guys at the parade, I relate to him better than most.  I won't vote for him, but I don't think he'll lose, no matter how much of a fight he has on his hands.  Why won't I vote for him if I think he's doing a good job?  He's one of the things I see wrong with our system.  In my view, we shouldn't have career politicians.  Goodlatte is just that.  I just can't support career politicians.

Which brings me to Virginia's Senate race.  With Senator Jim Webb (D) retiring, the race is down to two career politicians: George Allen (D) and career politician Tim Kaine (D).  I saw Kaine, but might have missed Allen, because I read that he was there.  Once I shook Goodlatte's hand, I decided to hide behind my camera and just click away so I didn't have to shake anybody else's hand.  I'm not voting for either of these two, either.  This is one of the toughest races in the US, and I hope they both lose.

The good sides of this parade were the actual BV-oriented parts.  SVU was fantastic.  Parry McCluer's marching band was fabulous.  For both, even my little girl got ecstatic.  Seeing VMI's bagpipes was awesome.  Though the flags didn't lead the parade (?), seeing the focus of the cadets was amazing.  My American-ness was touched to see it.

On to more pictures!  (Can anybody believe that I've become the picture guy?!?)

 This is all-too-familiar for Labor Day.

 As is this.  Politicians buy votes by giving people candy.  We let our kids have the candy.  I won't be giving them my vote.

 Still brings a tingle.  Amazing sight.

 Why do cute girls go to parades?  Because they're invited, of course.  This is Miss Virginia, I think.

 This is Miss Junior Teen Virginia, or something like that.  That makes her, what...8? 

 The adopted symbol of Buena Vista: three old grouches.

 Analee: "I know some of them!"

 Buena Vista has American Indians?!?  Who knew?!?

 Obligatory cheer squad.

 Doesn't Ms. SVU seem happy?

 Poor guy got stuck at the end.

 Babe showing off her haul.  Or some of it.

They're glad to be home.

I'm generally a pretty politically-minded guy, but I'm glad to have missed the political speeches.  I just don't think anybody could have swayed my opinion, and looking at the divisions in town, I doubt many, if any, ended up swayed.  I'd rather spend the holiday with my family.

I was out before the fireworks started that night.  A good end to a long day.

Long enough!

This post is for pictures of Babe going to school for the first time.

Before that, though, an update on our schooling situation.  We're going to stick with public schools for the time being, but we're also going to supplement with out own teaching (as the public school isn't teaching her anything at this point).  Anika wrote a letter to the school outlining our problems with the way things were handled, and hopefully we can change the policy accordingly.  Even if it's a paper given to parents before the first day of school that they can choose to sign to give permission for any type of check on kids' health (which we would have gladly signed), we hope to get parent permission to be a part of BVCPS's future.

On to the pictures!

OK, so there are technically two first days.  You read about the false start.  That's the upper pictures.  The lower ones are her actual first day.